Licence to walk
Wednesday, September 26th, 2007
What the fuck is wrong with people? Don’t they understand the basic laws of life? I know we have discussed retarded drivers, but you would think that people would at least be able to walk on their own.
Archive for September, 2007
My Fantasy Football team sucks!
Tuesday, September 25th, 2007
Sweet leapin’ Jesus!! What in the hell is going on in Fantasy Football? What did I do to the FFL Gods that they might turn their collective heads on me? What transgressions of my own have resulted in this butt-raping of a season?
‘Till death do us part?
Tuesday, September 25th, 2007
A wise man once said: “All relationships end badly… or they wouldn’t end. Unless, of course, one of you dies.” However, to me, dieing is also a “bad” ending.
Well, let me tell you, I have had my share of “bad” relationships. And besides being somewhat older and substantially more bitter, I actually have become a […]
Vacation Bitches!
Friday, September 21st, 2007
Tomorrow morning I will be leaving with my wife on a 7 day vacation to the Outerbanks of North Carolina. We have a beach house and will be getting plenty wasted on the beach. It’s a long deserved vacation after a month of hell. Our house was robbed and my truck hit by some bitch […]
The Top Ten Funniest Taser Videos
Thursday, September 20th, 2007
What a great few weeks it’s been eh? A University of Florida student gets the well deserved “shock” of his life. A Warren, Ohio women gets tased numerous times. I honestly can say I have never been tased. However, I love watching people get tased. People think that we have some sort of “rights” as […]
“Mother [expletive], you think you can steal my [expletive] and sell it?”
Monday, September 17th, 2007
In case any of you haven’t seen it on the news, (crawl back under your rock) OJ Simpson was arrested last Thursday in Las Vegas. I know what you’re probably thinking. Whose throat did he slit now? Surprisingly that’s not the case. The Juicemaster is charged with two counts of each armed burglary and conspiracy […]
You look so fine… in your mugshot.
Sunday, September 16th, 2007
Can anyone honestly say that the “bad girl” thing has ever been “in”? Is it our fault we aren’t giving you enough attention? Now, for attention, all girls have to do is run over some pedestrians while driving drunk or get caught doing lines off a night club toilet seat. Celebrity life must suck.
Will Work for Food? I Do That Too Asshole.
Saturday, September 15th, 2007
I’m totally not the “save the world” type. I don’t want to save the rain forest or stop world hunger. Nor do I feel the need to save the homeless. There isn’t a week that goes by that I don’t see some jerk off standing around with a sign begging for money.
Crapspew Review: The Envirolet
Friday, September 14th, 2007
Holy crap! If anything has ever been worthy of a Crapspew Review, it’s this dandy right here: The Envirolet, environmentally friendly toilet.
In all matters of fairness, and because I’m not quite the asshole I lead people to believe, I will defer any further evaluation of The Envirolet until you have had a […]
“No Hablo Ingles.” Too fucking bad.
Thursday, September 13th, 2007
I really get annoyed by foreign people. Let me rephrase that. I really get annoyed by foreign people who are too lazy to learn the English language. All of you border-crossers out there can get pissed off at me and bitch about how I don’t know Spanish, but you know what? You don’t see me […]
